it is done.
i have graduated.
i'm proud of myself...
it was worth the homework.
now to avoid this hell of a
"h o m e"

do you know what it feels like
to wish you could just
die
just fall of the face of this earth
un-exist
is it possible to be completely sane
and have such thoughts?
i hurt inside
i hurt from you
i hurt from all of this
and i'm tired

i'm so tired i could die
do you ever think so?
i'm so depressed
baby, you say its not good
you say i shouldnt say these things
i'm so depressed it scares me
i want you to hold me
i dont want to spend another night alone
i want you to want me...
i want you to love me the way i love you...

you fuck me over and over
hours on end
until my eyes will hardly stay open
my body trembling
my heart
wishing you knew
screaming to tell you
i love you more than words

that's why i haven't bitched as much
why i massage your back if you say it hurts
why i give you 30 for a quarter
trusting you'll smoke a bowl
give me the rest...
why i would wait on you hand and foot if thats what it took
to keep you
i won't loose you
i refuse to
you're what keeps me alive
who else would it hurt as much as it would hurt soulmate?

i could'nt do it
but if it happened
just so happened to happen
i would thank whatever higher power is there...

self destruct

leave |me| alone

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